Warning. This is fairly graphic, not at all insightful. If you are a friend of mine, stop. Reading. Here. I recently read that watermelon has roughly the same effect on guys as Viagra. Naturally, I read this after a particularly horny week where no amount of masturbation seemed to help the constant throbbing in my pants. Even more unfortunate was that Al was having a super stressful week with work/school and sex was the last thing on his mind. A simple text message let him know how I was feeling. “FYI- I’m in Dean Monroe mode right now…” His reply was – “I love Dean Monroe mode.” What is Dean Monroe mode you ask? Here's Dean- I relate with a story of what occurred later that night. I woke him up at 1:30 in the morning and proceeded to suck his glorious dick for an entire hour while simultaneously spurting out some of my recent Dean Monroe driven fantasies. He was a bit shocked that me- innocent and boyish- wanted to get so dirty! Needless to say, most of it was all a fantasy, stuff he likes hearing in between deep throatings. But there is one thing that I have been aweful curious to try. I know what is completely to blame as well. Tim Kruger. Definitely this guy's fault: I’m a huge fan of Tim Tales. I love the guys, I love the videos… seriously. Probably one of the hottest sites around today. But I promise this is not just an advertisement for them. Their latest video involved Tim and another big dicked latin top with a hot bottom. Three way videos are often terrible, but this was amazing. And then… both Tim and the latin guy double stuff the bottom. Previously, if you had brought it up to me I would have told you that Albert is way too big him to be inside me with another guy. But these two guys were HUGE… it gives me hope. Whether or not I’ll actually ever do it remains to be seen, but perhaps it is possible. So, the very thought of this brought on a whole lot of masturbating on my part. I was constantly hard, constantly stroking it. Albert had to go home for the weekend and there I was. Hard. Alone. Horny as shit. We have two sex toys in the house. A dildo, which actually had dust on it from lack of use, and a fleshjack. I’ve used it once or twice and have to admit, its nice. Albert is a total top, so its nice to play around with so I can be… ever so slightly versatile. And then it dawned on me. Why couldn’t I use them BOTH AT THE SAME TIME?!? It was a genius plan. So… I lube my ass up, lube the dildo up, lube the fleshjack up… then spent 15 minutes trying to get the dildo in because I’m somehow stay as tight as a virgin. Once I get it in and get comfortable with it I started with the fleshjack. This was my face: 30 seconds later I was ready to blow… but I held out. For an entire hour. That’s right. No…. you read that correctly. I used them for an hour. See what I mean now, by saying that I had a really slutty weekend all to myself? It was pretty ridiculous, but also amazing at the same time. It was the most fun I’d had with myself since I discovered masturbation. And I can’t even remember the last time I came so much. And also, I stopped eating as much watermelon, because I didn’t want to wear the skin right off my cock.