Not to get started on a controversial topic, but…

Ok, so I don't mean to make a serious post here. The Male Star Blog is all about fun, hot celebrities (with a few extra surprises), but this seems to be a pretty big deal in Hollywood right now so I thought I would talk about it real quick. Any of you who have seen the trailer for the new Ron Howard movie 'The Dilemma', or have at least read the stories about it, know that Vince Vaughn's character says, "Thats gay!" in response to something he thinks is dumb. Its cause quite a big stir with big organizations like GLAAD going after Howard, Vaugh and the studio to remove the 'joke' from the film. It was removed from the trailer shortly after it's release a few weeks ago. Ron Howard, however, has recently come out and stated the following: "Our lead character of Ronny Valentine has a mouth that sometimes gets him into trouble and he definitely flirts with the line of what's okay to say. He tries to do what's right but sometimes falls short. Who can't relate to that? I am drawn to films that have a variety of characters with different points of view who clash, conflict and learn to live with each other. THE DILEMMA is a story full of flawed characters whose lives are complicated by the things they say to and hide from each other. Ronny is far from perfect and he does and says some outrageous things along the way." Right. Well, I don't understand what the big deal is. I'm an open gay man and didn't think twice about the line when I saw it in the movie. When I first read all about the hooplah about this I thought, "Well, maybe its because I'm so desensitized to it... do I need to be upset?" No, that wasn't it. Things like this just don't bother me. Short of calling me a faggot to my face in a nasty way, very little offends me. To me, when someone says, "thats gay" and they are talking about something that doesn't fuck other men in the ass, I don't think twice about it. As a society, we are becoming way too sensitive about every minority/majority group out there. Its almost hard to breathe without offending someone and having some huge group denouncing your actions. Personally, I think we need to brush things off and not take everything so personally. It is quite possible though, that the joke is creating such a big stink because of the recent publicized gay teenage suicides that have been tragically occurring. When I look at it from that point of view, from someone who is emotionally vulnerable, scared and so unsure of everything, I understand people's outrage. So, I thought I'd get a good discussion going here with your points of view on this. What do you guys think? Here is the trailer for the film, but it does not have the 'gay joke' in it. The joke was, "Ladies and gentleman, electric cars are gay."
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10 thoughts on “Not to get started on a controversial topic, but…”

  1. I happen to agree, but regardless of personal effects about the saying “That’s so gay”, it puts a negative light on LGBT. Nobody would ever say “That’s black” or “That’s Hispanic” to call something lame or dumb. That’s why people are trying to evolve from that thought process because it causes a lot of damage in society’s attitude toward gays. I mean look at the United States, we are like a turtle compared to the rest of the world when it comes to gay rights. Although there isn’t a single country that gives absolute right to gays, the US progression compared to Germany or Canada is minute. And the reason for that is because of the attitude.

    What I want to happen is turn the spotlight away from the stereotypes, away from the Ru Pauls and the Queer Eyes and focus on the working gay man or woman. The couples who have been together for lifetimes. The regular people in this nation who are gay but are just like everyone else, that’s what needs to be focused on in order to stem away from the negative ideas. That way nobody has to worry about bullying at school or at work no matter what age.
    All we can really do is just hope.

    1. @Jon: It does put a negative light on the LGBT community. I honestly have mixed feelings on it. On one hand, I just don’t take what people say all too seriously unless they are being really nasty; on the other hand, I feel like this should offend me- I feel like I should get upset when people say things like this. But I read another blog where someone brought up the same point about the ‘thats black’ or ‘thats hispanic’ and you are certainly correct. I guess we’ll see what happens!

    2. @Jon: I don’t mean to be a stalker or anything, but I can see the link to you FB profile and I have to ask if that is your bulldog? I effing love bulldogs!

    3. I agree with everything you said except for the whole Rupaul/Queer Eye thing. We have gays who are drag queens and feminine/flamboyant why should we put them in the closet just because straight people like stereotype all gays to be like that. I find it really disgusting when people make comments like that (I’m going to assume that you didn’t mean it like that.) It’s like me telling another black person to stop being so “black” because other races like to stereotype us.

      Gays come in many different ways and we shouldn’t take the focus off of certain type of gay just because people like to stereotype us gays.

  2. We just have to remenber that not too long ago we heard about wave of teens who took their own lives, well because of these negative statements it is pretty hard for young individuals growing up to find a comfortable place in our society.It is the responsibility of each one of us , especially those who have a platform to make the world a better place for the most fragile among us.

    1. @bg: You’re right about that bg. I think that is why there is such an ‘outrage’ over this comment at this time. Bad timing I guess you could say.

  3. @admin.I respectfully disagree with the idea of bad timing.It’s never a good time to single out a group of people in order to scapegoat or ridicule them.Gay teens just like any other teen growing up need models they can identify with.We MUST stop sending negative or mixed messages ,for if they do not lead to suicide,at least they will make it hard for them to live fully and productively.
    Listen, I just finished a book titled “Becoming a man” by Paul Monette.
    Anyone who truly has a heart will be touched by the story of this man
    Allow me to encourage you to read it if you have not already done so,(it is a quick read)
    You know what they say;”Those who do not learn history are bound to repeat it”.In spite of our awareness of the ugly side of human history(racial discrimination,holocaust,crusades,inquisition………………..)
    WE STILL DO NOT GET IT.
    N.B A new case,young Brandon Bitner 14years old killed himself last friday he was perceived in his school as being gay.
    peace to you.
    I

    1. @bg: I’ll definitely check the book out. And by the bad timing comment, I simply meant to say I don’t think it would have received all the bad press it has if it hadn’t been for recent tragedies (the ones that were publicly shared anyway). I happen to agree with you.

  4. I hate when people say minority groups are becoming to sensitive. What’s wrong with being considerate of the feelings of others. If I say something that offends someone and it’s brought to my attention I’ll apologize to them and try to never say what offended them in the first place, it all seems very simple to me.

    Overall I think we lack empathy and that’s why we have such a problem with offending other and bullying. There’s nothing wrong with being sensitive to the feelings of others.

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